I have seen where you have advocated “normalizing” the Destiel relationship (don’t know if that’s still the case), but do you think Dean’s hesitation is less about recognizing what/who he wants for his own and more about believing he has the right to have it for himself? His entire life has been about taking care of Sam; when would he ever have the opportunity to choose his own happiness? If that’s the case, should shippers assume we won’t get Destiel until the series finale?

intelligentshipper:

While I feel like Sam would benefit (ironically) from the normalization of Destiel (which we’re kind of gradually getting since I said that?) by opening up more floor room for him and less for arc after arc of romantic storytelling, I do feel like Destiel would be specifically endgame for a variety of other factors.

This, chiefly, being what I call Exodus Effect. With such an overwhelming amount OF support for it (in various sliding scales of dedication), but such a war wearied viewership, if people get a “big dramatic confirmation”, the “Will They/Won’t They” lure is gone for most and for many – whether we want to admit it or not – there’s a LARGE swath of bitter, tired, exhausted stans that would just tune out. They got their ever after, the show is beaten out well past its base longevity, and boom. If 72%~ scale in support and only a quarter are bitter, we’re still talking about an 18%~ viewership loss out of the GATE. Not counting the drag-and-dribble that people feel shows lose their “charm” once UST is addressed, which just turns into a ratings bleed afterward. Honestly, the true antis are such a minority that it’s less them leaving that is the threat, it’s people just losing one of the longest lived character arcs to date that have stretched past repeat looping storylines on top of it.

In regards to what Dean wants: That’s a speculation I’ve definitely held; also one I’ve seen from good Dean-observers (I run a text based game, have for a while; my Dean players in order have been a psychologist and a lit professor, and they did fantastic character meta) make it multifaceted.

• Repression issues
• “I don’t deserve this”
• Not used to doing things for himself
• Reciprocation confusion wrt Cas generally not being a sexual/physical creature
• And more

These are all things that can be gradually addressed over time, and some actually have been at this point.  I think the biggest thing they need to consider is Exodus/loss of UST effect for any giant expositions, but “normalization” of it, including increasing day-to-day significance of their interactions and the undertones of it, is also another method to approach towards that without a significant “Boom, seal the book” that still leaves more room for Sam’s cross-engagement to shine (which was my original point in advocating the normalization of it). We now have Jack, Rowena, and possibly Gabriel to start rebuilding Sam’s reach in story and I want everything for him in that, so not focusing on loop after loop of Destiel over-reaching story but instead their persistent presence with chemistry based undercurrent is a secure method. I’d love to just see some passive implication of a shared room or something, but others would feel underwhelmed with that kind of thing, so the writers are in a bit of a catch-22.

All just IMO of course, but observation based.