Castiel Winchester is saved

cas-essence:

– and once again, he is the one doing the saving

(Now, I don’t know whether you can call the following accumulation if thoughts meta, but this has been going through my mind ever since 13×04 aired and I need to write it down.)

Even though every scene in 13×04 was filled to the brim with emotions, the one that finally send me over the edge and brought tears to my eyes was when Cas said “I am already saved”.

For several seasons, one of my biggest wishes was for us to get a reversal of Cas’ line to Dean: “What is it, Dean? You don’t think you deserve to be saved.” I always imagined it would come in the form of Dean saying to Cas something like “You deserve to be saved”, maybe in the context of Cas trying to sacrifice himself once more. I thought the most significant thing would be for Dean to accept Cas as he is and tell him he is loved, because for years that has been Cas role in Dean’s life (to be the person that sees Dean as he really is and loves him all the more for it and to be the person Dean, the eternal non-believer has faith in).

Now, of course, Dean’s feelings for Cas are in no way irrelevant and I would still be over the moon if, at some point, Dean tells him point blank that he’s not just needed, he’s wanted and loved. But still, the way in which the writers chose to reverse the line “You don’t think you deserve to be saved” is so much better than anything I thought of before!

Because while Dean’s love for Cas is important, it can’t save him!

The only person who will ever be able to save Cas is himself. (Note that Cas response of “I am already saved” is to empty!cas saying “Save yourself”)

Now, does Cas saying “I am already saved” mean the fight is over? No, of course not. Cas followed it up with “I will fight. I will fight. I will fight …”, meaning he knows full well that he might have to do so indefinitely and that he might still lose. (I wonder whether he himself expected the empty to spit him out that soon.)

“I am already saved”, at that moment becomes a declaration about his own willingness to keep that fight up, however long he has to. It is the strongest declaration of faith we’ve heard from Cas in years and for the first time, it was a declaration of faith not in God, not in his siblings, not in the Winchesters, but instead a declaration of faith in himself.